Sleeping With A Snake!

I first met him at the bus stop. He took the same bus as I did to go to work each day and we would usually joke and chat. He was always a perfect gentleman. We both worked down town right across the street from each other so it was just a matter of time before we met in the food court. That day finally came, we bumped into each other in a line while waiting to pay for lunch and he asked to sit with me. I agreed and we spent the rest of our lunch hour talking and laughing about almost nothing. I thought to my self what a great guy and not bad looking either. But as you know, looks can sometimes be misleading.

He was recently divorced and was still adjusting to single life. He said that dating again was the toughest thing to get used to. I agreed as I was also divorced as well so I understood what he was taking about. He seemed very surprised to find out that I to was divorced, he said that any man would be an idiot to give me up. I said how sweet of you to say that. “Well its true!” he said. “You are pretty special in my eyes, and  I would give my eye teeth if you would go out with me”. So we ended up agreeing to go on a date together.

We had so many things in common. It was inevitable that we very quickly hit it off in a major way. Since both of us were a bit gun shy, we decided to take things a bit slow at first. As we got to know each other better, it was just a matter of time before we felt ready to make the next step. I guess it was only right for both of us to be a little nervous. Even so, we both made a commitment to go to his cottage for a romantic interlude the next weekend.

Well the day came and he drove down to my house to pick me up for our romantic weekend get away. As a matter of fact that’s exactly what I should have told him, “GET AWAY”, but like a love starved teenager I had fallen for a handsome face and a sad story. To my disappointment, the love nest that I had imagined turned out to be about the size of a small woodshed, and the roof had fallen in to boot. It needed a ton of work. I had no idea what he was thinking to take me (or any woman for that matter) there. I am not a super particular person most of the time, but this was so far below my expectations that I was entirely speechless!  We had to sleep in a very small tent that I discovered had a very large snake inside. As I fled into the night screaming in fear, he ran behind me asking what he could do to make the situation more livable. I said I was scared because that is not the type of snake I was expecting!

The next morning I politely packed my things, thanked him for a somewhat interesting evening and told him that I just didn't think it would work. I felt bad as he drove me home, but what else could I do? He totally lied about his love nest to me. What else would he lie to me about in the future?

That night my friend told me about a fantastic link she visited that took her to hundreds of great dating sites. Since I had nothing to lose I decided to give it a try.

I joined at least three different sites that looked like they would meet my needs, but after a few months, I had almost given up hope. It was not as if I was not meeting men, it was just that there was no spark when we finally dated in person. That je ne sais quois is just so necessary for a long term relationship. I had 'settled' the first time around, and I was determined not to make the same mistake again. It was at this point that I met 'him'! He was what I was looking for. Finally! It was as if God had tailor made him for me! We talked online for several weeks and then he gave me his phone number and asked me to give him a call. The first time I called him, his voice seemed very familiar to me. Something was nagging at me that I knew that voice, but I just could not figure out where from. I just put it down to coincidence, and that he just sounded a bit like someone I knew. We laughed and joked as we talked over the next few weeks. I had such an easy time talking to him. I was so joyous I got that link. I still cannot imagine what a better gift could be. I was floating on air. I felt like a teenager again. Bubbling with enthusiasm and overjoyed. All my friends noticed and remarked on it! What a joy he brought to my life!

The only thing that was strange about our online relationship was that I had never seen his face. He would not do video chats, and he would not even send me a picture of himself. Whenever I pressed him on the issue, he said that he did not think that someone should be judged by their looks alone and that he felt that a face to face meeting was the best way to judge someone.The day came for me to meet him. He seemed a bit weird to me when we talked on the phone the day before. He suggested that I would run the other way when I saw him and that left me confused. I was beginning to be concerned about what he looked like. I had visions of the Hump Back of Notre Dame going through my head! Even when I gave him my assurances that I would stay put, he still seemed unconvinced.

Instead of picking me up, he insisted on meeting me at his country place. So he gave me the directions to his place. On the way, I experienced Deja Vu a few times. It was almost as if I knew what was around some of the bends before I got there. As the feeling grew more intense, it finally dawned on my why this was so familiar. This was the same area where the guy with the snakes in his tent lived! I almost turned around right on the spot, but what could I do? I had given him my word. So I kept on going. He met me on the road about a half mile from where I was to meet him, no wonder he was worried I would run.

I jumped out of the car and rushed to the back to open the trunk. I was looking for the tire iron so I could show him what I thought of his duplicity! He ran up to me and pinned my arms before I could do anything rash. I told me to please relax so that I could see his real surprise. We walked the rest of the way to where we had set up the tent so long ago. I kept looking for snakes, so I was not paying that much attention. When he told me to look up, I was stunned! I was looking at the cutest summer cottage that I had ever seen.. He told me he wanted to contact me earlier because he had really fallen for me. He said he knew he wouldn't have much of a chance with me unless he could prove that he was a decent, caring, hard-working person and not just another kook.

He told me he decided to finish the cottage for me first, because I deserved something special and nice. He took out a loan and used all his savings. He did all that just for me! “WOW!” I was overwhelmed. I began to cry to think that someone could care about me so much.

That was quite some time ago now, and things are even better now than they were then. The more I am with him, the more I love him. We got formally hitched a few months after that. The more time I spent with him, the more I realized just how special he was and how much more I loved him.

Now technically, I did not meet this guy on that dating site really, but if I had not met him again anonymously, I would likely have never given him that second chance. Ouch! Thank God for that dating site! My best friend has earned my perpetual gratitude for giving me that URL. I am forever grateful to her.

So if you are in that same lonely situation that I was in, and see no way out, then click the link below. It was my key to happiness, and hopefully it can be yours as well.

Meet Your Perfect Match Like I Did!

Sex and The Great Outdoors

Even if you are not an outdoorsy kind of person, if you are dating over the course of a summer, you are likely to find yourself and your date communing with good old mother nature at some point. Whether that means camping or staying at a cottage, there will be many romantic moments as you enjoy yourself out in 'the wilds'. The fresh air of the country coupled with long lazy days and stimulating sunsets are likely to put both of you in a sensual/sexual state of mind. The nights will also add their share of enjoyment as you sneak down to the water to skinny-dip under the full moon and the wash of stars in the milky-way. Likely all of these activities will result in 'sex in the wild'. There is however an element of health risk involved, so you should not just do the 'down and dirty' without being prepared. Big city living means that you do not have some of the natural resistance to bacteria that your cave dwelling ancestors did, so you must be more prepared than they were able to be.

Problem: Sex in the Dirt (and Not the Down and Dirty Type Dirt

Being outdoors exposes you to a lot of dirt and grim. It is just a natural outcome of being outdoors. It cannot be helped. Normal outdoor activities like starting a fire, cooking over a campfire, cutting wood, and just the smoke and bug sprays leaves you a much less desirable person to be around from an intimacy point of view. No matter how amorous you might feel, the Hollywood movie version of an idyllic and loving camping trip or nature walk are unlikely to happen unless you take care of basic sanitation necessities. So there are a few recommendations. Wash up thoroughly before bedtime. When roughing it in the bush, take a container of 'wet wipes' with you to help keep yourself sanitary in your nether regions.

Solution: Wash As Much As Possible

There are ways around this pitfall, of course. In many national parks, or even state level parks, there are usually shower facilities. Of course this does not help you if you are on an overnight trip on a backpacking trail and miles away from a shower. Going during off peak hours – like after midnight – is a way avoid facility overload. Sneak in there together, and get dirty after you’ve got clean. An added bonus is that the sound of the shower will mask most modest sex noises, and will provide easy clean-up when you’ve finished. Be prepared for some quizzical and accusing looks if there are people waiting for the shower when the two of you exit. Odds are you’ll still be in post-coital bliss, so you won’t mind much.

Problem:  Privacy

It doesn’t take an acoustics engineer to realize that the millimeter of nylon that comprises your tent wall won’t do much to keep your sex noises private. And since sound travels so well over water, even people on the other side of the lake will be able to hear what you sound like when you’re trying the Inverted Reverse Pile-driver. Even worse, if you’ve gone camping with friends and their kids, there are going to be a lot of questions in the morning about the strange noises they’ve heard.

 Solution: Long Nature Treks

This one works like a charm, as long as you remember some basic safety tips. First, don’t go where there are bears. They can kill the mood and you’re partner. Second, don’t go at night – finding your way back in the dark when you’re brain has been scrambled by some hot sex is too difficult. Third, bring a blanket for comfort and to keep from getting grass and sand from getting in your various hairy parts. You should also let your camping buddies know where you are going in case you do not come back.  If you do not turn up on time because you just got too caught up in sex, then they can send the Rangers looking for you.

So this summer, enjoy copious, carefree, camping coitus carefully!

Online Dating Sites

Make Love Like a Porn Star

Many women would like to capture the love and attention of that special someone in their lives. The key problem is that most women are somewhat clueless as to what really satisfies a man in a way that moves his soul. Why do men look at porn movies or a blue movie of some sort? Is it the amazing acting? Likely not! There is something more at stake there.

The attraction is the idea of having a woman do whatever it takes to please him. Even if it is not quite everything, at least most things. A woman who is willing to totally satisfy him sexually, and is open enough to tell him exactly what he needs to do to please her as well.. Shy does not work here!! If you want to pleasure your man, then you have to be willing to take the initiative, surprise him by being aggressive about wanting sex at least half of the time. Nothing turns a man off more than being forced to beg for sex. You may not see it that way, but if you always expect the man to make the first move, after a while he will feel that they only way he can get laid is to beg for it.

Read more about it here:
 Make Love Like A Porn Star



If you are are interested in behaving like a porn star, then find a list of great places to find men here:
 Adult Dating Sites

How to Find Love Online

This article is focused on the use of online dating sites to find love and happiness. I have observed the online dating industry for some time now, more as a curiosity than as a member.  I joined several dating sites some years ago and ended up getting caught up in how it is that people interact online versus real life. I have also discussed dating and relationships extensively with people I have met who are/were in all types and phases of relationships.

So what have I found?
Interestingly enough, not much that has not already been discussed before.

Offline dating has been going on for thousands of years, and I doubt if anyone today could actually find much to add to the existing literature. I will therefore not try to pontificate in any manner on that aspect of dating, other than to note that most people tend to date within an extended community of friends for the most part. 

When it comes to Internet Dating, which has only been in existence since about 1995 or so, there are some insights that can be shared.

So lets start with some popular misconceptions:
Dating Sites Have Wonderful Matching Algorithms That Guarantee Me a Perfect Match
False – No matter how hard dating sites work at perfecting their compatibility formulas, they are handicapped by customers who lie about themselves, and customers who really have no idea what it is they are looking for. When it comes to relationships, people are much better at saying what they do not want than what they do want.

It Is Less Work To Find My Match On a Dating Site
False – To make a long story short, it takes a lot of time getting to know anyone that you hope to be your life partner. You just cannot take any shortcuts here. In fact, for this aspect of using a dating site it takes more effort because of the anonymous nature of the environment. Everyone is using made up handles, so it is not as if you can check with a mutual friend to see what they are really like.

Internet Dating Sites are a Great Place To Find People to Date
True – If you are a person who uses dating to interact with someone that you are interested in; then a dating site is likely to connect you with many more people than you can possibly find via your own means offline.

Dating Sites Are Better At Connecting You To Your Soul Mate.
False – Quantity does not equal quality. Just because you can see and interact with a lot more people online than you can in real life does not mean that you are being exposed to quality people that you have any real compatibility with, and even if you are compatible from an intellectual point of view, there is no guarantee that you will find the chemistry with them that you need to achieve soul mate status.


So What Good Are Dating Sites Anyway. They are dynamite if you are willing to be open and look outside of your normal comfort zone for possible matches. If you are not successful finding someone the normal way, it is often because you are just looking in the wrong places. Dating sites are amazing in the one single fact that everyone on them is looking to date. You do not have to prequalify each introduction with a lot of tap dancing trying to figure out if the person you are talking to is looking for someone.  If you approach online dating with an open mind, you will likely be able to interact with many more disparate people then you normally hang out with, and in that process, discover more about what you like in other people, which may just change your mind about who you need in your life to complete you.

If you approach education with an open mind, you will get 10 times as much out of it than you would if you try to educate yourself within your existing limits of knowledge and biases when you first start the process. Similarly, with dating sites, if you approach them with an open mind, and are willing to interact with people that you would not normally associate with in your normal day-to-day life, you may just find that the love of your life is not what your brain thought it was looking for.

So, open your heart and give online dating a try.

You can start here:
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/onlinedating.php

Dating BDSM

BDSM Online Dating is not for everyone. In case you do not know what it means, BDSM stands for Bondage, Domination, Sado-Masochism. If that gives you an image of people slapping each other black and blue, you need to understand that BDSM is not meant to be that physically abusive. For the most part, those people who get off on BDSM, seldom actually hurt each other, and it they do, it is usually more accidental than planned. More like jamming your finger rather than hitting it with a hammer. If whips are used, they are designed not to cut your skin, and they specially designed not to cut you skin or raise severe welts.. People do not hit hard because the excitement is in the domination or submissive nature of the act, not in causing pain. Slapping your tush can actually bring on a more powerful orgasm. On the other hand, the bondage side of the equation is quite real. There is something about trusting someone to let you go after that can be quite compelling sexually. This is usually fulfilled by just being lightly tied to a bed so that you are under someone's total control when making love. If you ever go to a sex show, there are often several merchants who sell special beds for bondage, or special sheets with tie-down strips on them to facilitate bondage. The buzz is had by either dominating or being dominated. It is about absolute trust. Ideally, they will use your helplessness to bring you into a sexual frenzy that you have to experience to understand.

If I have convinced you to give BDSM a try, then you should try the following link:

BDSM

 

Female Orgasms 101

In Victorian times, most adult females never experienced and orgasm. In actuality, most had no idea what an orgasm was.  Generations of women were raised with a lack of sex education, and usually believed that sex had to be painful, thus ensuring that the were not receptive to any form of pleasure. A twin study climaxing in 2005 reported that one woman in three had never or seldom had an orgasm, and just one tenth always achieved an orgasm. As you can see, orgasms are rare or non-existent for many women. A woman who cannot have an orgasm has as frustrating a life as a man with an erectile disfunction.

Now the question is how do we change all this, especially since today's women desire orgasms. Well let's begin by exploring what a female orgasm really is.  Woman experiencing an orgasm is similar to what men achieve-there is a surge of emotion, in a moment of incredible enjoyment, and a throbbing, electric sensation that spreads out through the body.  Rythmiccontractions take place within the pelvic area also encompassing the vaginal walls. One key difference is that women do not have to have a recovery period, and will usually be able to have multiple orgasms with ongoing coital stimulation, usually within 60 to 120 seconds. In most women, there is no fluid ejaculated during orgasm.  This is an important fact for men to know, so as to not feel like they have not pleasured their woman, or make them feel inadequate because they don't.

With the right partner, most women can achieve multiple orgasms if they so desire.

Unlike men, women need the right conditions before they are able to orgasm. For instance:

1) Women  must feel appreciated, and wanted a sensual surrounding
3) A partner whom they really like
4) Being at ease
5) A partner that knows how to stimulate the clitoris

You will not have great success in giving your partner orgasms if you fail to provide most of the above.

Men should understand that women can have different types of orgasms---the most common is orgasm of the clitoris.  The clitoris is a woman's main sexual pleasure point and can be stimulated orally or with the fingers. The clitoral orgasm can have fluid expelled or be dry, and climaxes in uterus contractions . Another type of orgasm is centered on the G-spot. The G spot is a bit of a chore to find: it is located on the upper wall of the vagina about the length of your index finger in. In most women the G-spot is about 3 inches into the vagina, and on the upper side.  Gentle but firm pressure is required to find the G spot if the woman is not stimulated yet.  It feels like a spongy area about the size of a small bean. The exact size and location can vary slightly from female to female.  When properly manipulated, the G spot will result in a vaginal orgasm.

Figure 1



In conclusion, sex is something very sensual that will provide both partners with a wonderful rush of pleasurable feelings. The next list is a summary that can help both of you have orgasms regularly:

1) 2)Be gentle, especially when touching her genitals, or rubbing her clitoris
3) Use your tongue and lips to stimulate and gently suckle her breasts
4) Take it slow- it is not a race
5) Ask her if she likes what you are doing and ask her to tell you what she wants
6) Be a tease- touching her pleasurable spots then withdrawing over, and over again. This will intensify the orgasm and the pleasure for both of you.
7) Use your own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris – however she may need additional lubrication, you can buy lubricants at any drugstore.
8) Learn her body- does her nipples get hard only during arousal or are they like that at other times
9) Experiment: try different things
10) Don't make demands: this could spoil the moment

Men should read and practice the techniques in this guide, because more female orgasms are the keys to the kingdom of much more sex.

If you are an unsatisfied woman – nag your partner to read this article, after all, your entire future is at stake!

Good Luck!

If this article has peaked your interest then follow the link below.
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/advice_for_men.php
 

Have Sex – Will Orgasm

In Victorian times, most adult females did not have orgasms. In actuality, a lot of them had no idea what an orgasm was.  Generations of women were raised with rudimentary knowledge of sex, and usually believed that sex had to be painful, thus ensuring that the were not receptive to any form of pleasure. In fact a twin study climaxing in 2005 reported that one woman in three had never or seldom had an orgasm, and just one tenth always achieved an orgasm. As you can see, orgasms are rare or non-existent for many women. A woman who cannot have an orgasm is similar to a man having an erectile disfunction.

So how can we change this, especially since today's women want orgasms. Well let's begin by exploring what a female orgasm really is.  Woman experiencing an orgasm is much like that in men-there is a surge of emotion, marking a moment of incredible enjoyment, and a throbbing, twitchy sensation that extends throughout the body.  Rythmicpulsations take place within the area of the pelvis including the walls of the vagina. Another difference here is that women don't have to have a recovery period, and will usually be able to have multiple orgasms with continued clitoral stimulation, often within a minute or two. In most women, there is no fluid ejaculated during orgasm.  This is an important fact for men to know, so as to not feel like they have not pleasured their woman, or make them feel inadequate because they don't.

With the right stimulation, most women can have multiple orgasms if they so desire.

Women are physiologically pickier than men when it comes to achieving an orgasm. For instance:

1) They need to feel wanted, and appreciated a romantic atmosphere
3) A person they click with
4) Being at ease
5) The right degree if clitoral stimulation – not to rough, not too easy

You will not have great success in giving your partner orgasms if you fail to provide most of the above.

Men need to know that women can have different types of orgasms---the most common is the clitoral orgasm.  The clitoris may be stimulated in a few ways, but the most common are oral stimulation or hand manipulation. The clitoral orgasm can have fluid expelled or be dry, and leads to pulsations within the uterus . Another type of orgasm is called the G Spot. The G spot is tougher to zero in on: it is located on the upper side of the vagina – about one half way in. In most women the G-spot is about 3 inches into the vagina, and on the upper side.  Firm pressure is needed to find the G spot in its non-stimulated state.  It feels like a spongy area about the size of a small bean. The location and size varies somewhat from woman to woman.  A vaginal orgasm will usually occur if the G-spot is appropriately stimulated.

Figure 1, Internal Female Anatomy:




In summation, an orgasm is a wonderful thing that will provide both partners with intense pleasure. The following can help you to help your female partner have orgasms regularly:

1) Women like affection---use your hands, and or mouth to caress her body be gentle, especially when touching her genitals, or rubbing her clitoris
3) Use your tongue and lips to stimulate and gently suckle her breasts
4) Slow and easy is the only way to win this race
5) Verbalize, ask for feedback
6) Be a tease- touching her pleasurable spots then withdrawing over, and over again. This will build arousal, and heighten orgasm.
7) Use your own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris – however she may need additional lubrication, you can buy lubricants at any drugstore.
8) Learn her body- does her nipples get hard only during arousal or are they like that at other times
9) Experiment: try different things
10) Don't make demands: this could spoil the moment

All men, can use this as a guide to helping your women have a more pleasurable experience, and helping her achieve many orgasms.

If you are an unsatisfied woman – convince your partner to read this article, after all, your future happiness is at stake!

Good Luck!
If your looking for someone to spend some time with then the link below can show you the way to dozens of some of the best sites.
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/advice_for_men.php

Dating Online

There are thousands of dating sites on the Internet, ranging from excellent to scams. Most are just small operations trying to make a buck off of lonely people, and they have just too few clients to ever successfully match you with anybody. Many dating sites are not free, and some that pretend to be free are only free for some minimal functionality.

Most sites will let you view other profiles, but you will have to pay to interact with other members. But even if you do end up paying to contact someone, who ends up being the love of your life, that would likely be a pretty good deal. In any event, the link below will take you to a location with listing of the best online dating sites on the internet.

Dating Sites

Take Your Bananas And Go

I sort of fell into communicating with a guy online for a couple of months because my best friend gave him my messenger address. We then decided to meet in person one Friday afternoon and go out for a nice lunch. You know to get to know each other and break the ice so to speak. He lived quite some distance from me, but agreed to meet me on my turf. I was rather shocked when my much anticipated date shows up in this old junker truck!

I greeted him at the door and was completely underwhelmed to say the least. He looked like he had just crawled out from under his truck, and apparently that is what had happened. His truck had broken down, and not wanting to be late he decided not to change after fixing it. He insisted that I drive, and when I got in and saw a gaping hole in the passenger floor boards, I understood why.

We went to a small Chinese buffet for lunch. It was nice and the food was very good. I was starting to become impressed, but that did not last too long.  After telling me how nice I looked, always nice to hear, he proceeded to tell me that he only had two toes on one foot (like I really gave a shit) and how he had lost them as a child playing with his father's rifle. He said that he had told me that he had a job so that I would not think him a loser. He said he was about to lose his house that I found out wasn't a house at all but a friend's garage. Then this loser started to blubber that he had nothing. No job, no prospects and he knew that he was not good looking. He was so annoying it was pathetic. What could I do but just pat his hand and tell him to be patient that there is someone out there for him and that things will work out for him eventually. I felt obligated to pay for lunch, and we went back to my apartment.

He told me he had a gift for me in the truck and said he hoped that yellow was my favorite color. I told him it was and he seemed pleased as he raced away. I stood there wondering what in the world could he have bought me that was yellow. Well I soon found out. He came back with some ripe bananas for crying out loud. I was stunned!. At this point I was informed that since he had too much to drink, he would have to spend the night. Holy cow! I tried to push him out the door. I could not budge him so I did the only thing I could do. I attacked him with my bananas, hurling them at him until he backed up into the hall, then I slammed the door! He continued pounding on my door saying let me in. I told him to pack up his bananas, especially the one in his pants and leave, or I would call the cops. Thank God he left.

It was the most expensive date I have ever been on. I had to move and change all my personal online information. My friends never give out my personal information anymore.

I am going to try an online dating site. They guarantee anonymity. Hopefully the guys their can come up with something other than just their bananas to keep me happy.

Online Dating Sites

Dating Online Insights

Dating Online Survey Results:

The following summary from a study of 100 exurbanites details some insights gained as to how people seek out dates and potential life partners. Online Dating Services may not result in you winning your life partner, but it may be a needed break from all those phony sounding Match.com and e Harmony.com commercials on TV that try to convince you about how lonely you are during late night movies.

<bold>Resulting Dating Insights:</bold>

1)     It is not uncommon for members of the online dating community to be members on various sites at the same time. The attitude is that the more exposure you give yourself to other people, the more likely it is that you will find a match. Sort of like buying several lottery tickets instead of just one. These same people are likely to be dating several different people concurrently hoping to find the one who clicks. Playing the field is a defense mechanism in the online arena. Because of the anonymity of the sites, you cannot tap into you normal social networks to find out about the people you are talking to online, or dating in real life. There is a much higher chance of being taken in by a smooth talker. It is also easy to give your heart away to a loser. Keeping several people “in process” at the same time helps you from “settling” on any one of them prematurely. In conventional dating situations, other than blind dates, you have some concept of how a person interacts with others because you usually have a chance to observe them in action from afar. It is one of the reasons why blind dates get such a bad rap, because you do not know what to expect, nor can you prepare yourself. Online dating does allow some interaction, but meeting in person for the first time has more of the hallmarks of a blind date than it does in conventional dating.

2)     Online Dating is much more superficial – pictures and videos are everything – without them you get almost no action, or attention.  Ladies about having less than average looks. If you do a good job of portraying yourself in both words and pictures of someone who loves to have fun, you will get positive results.  This is a marketing exercise, not a life story exercise. If you are selling beauty products on television you do not explain each step of the research that lead to the product. Although you might mention the research, you tend to focus on the results, and the benefits. Market yourself in a positive and flattering manner. Whatever you do, do not post a picture of yourself that is taken with your web cam – the video quality sucks, and you can never show yourself in a socially fun situation with a web cam If you are a woman, just remember that men see and assume – most do not read much, they look and evaluate visually for the most part, so keep the words to a minimum. For men, you must read the words!! Women are strong communicators and they will say what they are looking for, and they will also say what they are definitely not looking for. Be honest about who or what you are, and do not annoy a women with attention of any sort if you are definitely on her “must not be” list.  In any event, for both men and women, keep the brief and factual (within limits of course – this is marketing after all). If you are lucky, you will find another with a complementary sense of fun and similar interests. Be prepared to use the email and chatting facilities of the online site to get to know people better. Do not try to give your life story in the profile.  Your profile is a 15 second ad spot, not an biography of your life.

3)     Men without jobs have little or no traction on dating sites that are focused on long-term relationships. In their heads, women are looking for winners, not losers. On the other hand, if you connect to a woman's soul, they will often overlook the fact that you are pick up trash for a living, as long as you are able to show her that you have solid future prospects.  By the way, keep information about your personal finances close. There are a lot of gold diggers out there!

4)     BBW women are as disadvantaged as they think they are. If a women is slightly overweight, or is of a set of proportions that the weight that they carry is evenly distributed, most men are okay with it. If you are not wider than you are tall, then likely you have a pretty good chance of finding someone. In any event, most women will post a profile of themselves at a younger and lighter age, and then proceed to lighten the age load a few years on top of that in their profile.  Men are generally more honest about their ages, but may actually be more inclined to lie about their income. You will find however, that men almost never tell the full truth about their body weight. Almost all men show themselves as athletic, or average, almost never as overweight in any manner.

5)     You must have contact with a person for love to develop. You cannot really be in love with someone that you have only talked to on a computer. You must meet in person for love to happen.  You either totally connect and love someone, or you do not. It is the many little interactions between two people that add up to someone falling in love. If you meet someone online, they will likely want to meet in person within two to four weeks. If you are too cautious, then the person will likely meet someone else in the meantime, and you will fail. Don't forget, if you are attracted to them, then others will be too, and since everyone on dating sites are trying to meet as many people as is reasonably possible, you are in a time limited competition to win their hearts.

6)     There is still some negative social pressure with regards to Internet dating, and it is usually from older people these days. The real problem with online personals sites is that they have had a reputation in the past for being the hangouts of losers and predators. Nothing is further from the truth. With this in the back of their minds, people sometimes avoid using dating sites so they will not be branded a loser, or looked at as a potential sexual predictor or something equally disgusting.  The fact is that over 60 million people in North America have used online dating sites in the last few years, and there are just not that many losers and predators in North America. Because of the anonymous nature of dating sites, you are more likely to be targeted by deviants on face book, where everyone can see your real name, than on a dating site, where nobody knows your real name or where you live. People are strangely closed mouthed about telling people that they met online, which leads many people who have never used a dating service to assume it is useless, or worse yet, just a scam. People will admit that they met in line getting an unemployment check, but they will not admit to meeting online for some reason.

7)    Online dating is amazing in it’s ability to connect people who would likely never have met in real life. The fact that everyone on the site is looking to meet someone for the purpose of dating, or establishing a long term relationship, it is incredibly easy to start up a conversation with someone that you have never met. You already have at least one subject in common – dating. Online dating is actually the best forum for people to meet when they are just too busy, too tied up, or just not inclined to be wandering around bar hopping or social clubs trying to meet people. Online dating is the wave of the present and future if you want to find successful and interesting people. Do not expect every match presented to be made in heaven. There will still be some off spec people in the barrel, so keep on trying.


If you are interested in online dating sites, then you might want to check out this resource page:

Online Dating

How to Find Love Online

This is a totally unscientific rant based on my own observations of people both in real life and on dating sites. I have observed the online dating industry for some time now, more as a curiosity than as a member.  As a member of several dating sites over the years, I have seen first hand how it is that people interact both successfully and unsuccessfully. I have also discussed dating and relationships extensively with people I have met who are/were in all types and phases of relationships.

So what have I found?
Perhaps not too much that has not already been discussed by others in the past, but perhaps with a different twist on it.

When it comes to people meeting in real life, well, that has been going on for millennium, I have absolutely nothing to add on this topic that has not already been hashed out by writers since the time that man first developed writing. 

Internet dating, which is a higher tech offshoot of the matchmaking services that have been around for hundreds of years, is a relatively new beast, and as such, there are some insights that can be passed on that most people have yet to learn.

So lets start with some popular misconceptions:
Dating Sites Have Fool Proof Matching Formulas
False – Some dating sites work very hard trying to perfect their compatibility algorithms but some others just use superficial matching criteria – what is interesting is that neither extreme of these sites perform statistically better than the other.  The reason is that, quite frankly, there are two main obstacles that cannot be overcome when you are trying to match by formula.

It Is Less Work To Find My Match On a Dating Site
False – Once you find someone you are interested in, no matter what the relationship you desire, to get on top of it, you have to spend a lot of time getting to know the person. And at some point you will become comfortable that they are not blowing smoke up your tush. If not, all bets are off and you are back to square one looking for someone else who interests you.

Internet Dating Sites are a Great Place To Find People to Date
True – There is just so many people and so much selection on dating sites, it is almost a walk in the park to find someone to date (for a walk in the park of course).

Dating Sites Are Better At Connecting You To Your Soul Mate.
False – Maybe false is too harsh – it is a definite perhaps, and it depends on your attitude. If you are willing to look outside of your normal comfort zone, you have a better chance finding someone on an internet dating site that you would through your own personal network of friends.


So What Good Are Dating Sites Anyway Well, they are really good for people who are open to discovering more about what they are really interested in. They are good for people who have not been successful finding their soul mate in real life because quite frankly they are looking for the wrong type of person in the wrong places.  If you approach online dating with an open mind, you will likely be able to interact with many more disparate people then you normally hang out with, and in that process, discover more about what you like in other people, which may just change your mind about who you need in your life to complete you.

To that end, you should approach using an online dating system the way you would approach getting an education. It is possible to educate yourself without going to school, but going to a school makes it easier to obtain a well-rounded education. Similarly, it is possible for you to find the love of your life without using a dating site, but you will likely be exposed to a whole lot more varying people at a dating site than you would by tapping into your circle of friends..

So, open your heart and give online dating a try.

You can start here:
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/onlinedating.php