This is a totally unscientific rant based on my own observations of people both in real life and on dating sites. I have observed the online dating industry for some time now, more as a curiosity than as a member. As a member of several dating sites over the years, I have seen first hand how it is that people interact both successfully and unsuccessfully. I have also discussed dating and relationships extensively with people I have met who are/were in all types and phases of relationships.
So what have I found?
Perhaps not too much that has not already been discussed by others in the past, but perhaps with a different twist on it.
When it comes to people meeting in real life, well, that has been going on for millennium, I have absolutely nothing to add on this topic that has not already been hashed out by writers since the time that man first developed writing.
Internet dating, which is a higher tech offshoot of the matchmaking services that have been around for hundreds of years, is a relatively new beast, and as such, there are some insights that can be passed on that most people have yet to learn.
So lets start with some popular misconceptions:
Dating Sites Have Fool Proof Matching Formulas
False – Some dating sites work very hard trying to perfect their compatibility algorithms but some others just use superficial matching criteria – what is interesting is that neither extreme of these sites perform statistically better than the other. The reason is that, quite frankly, there are two main obstacles that cannot be overcome when you are trying to match by formula.
It Is Less Work To Find My Match On a Dating Site
False – Once you find someone you are interested in, no matter what the relationship you desire, to get on top of it, you have to spend a lot of time getting to know the person. And at some point you will become comfortable that they are not blowing smoke up your tush. If not, all bets are off and you are back to square one looking for someone else who interests you.
Internet Dating Sites are a Great Place To Find People to Date
True – There is just so many people and so much selection on dating sites, it is almost a walk in the park to find someone to date (for a walk in the park of course).
Dating Sites Are Better At Connecting You To Your Soul Mate.
False – Maybe false is too harsh – it is a definite perhaps, and it depends on your attitude. If you are willing to look outside of your normal comfort zone, you have a better chance finding someone on an internet dating site that you would through your own personal network of friends.
So What Good Are Dating Sites Anyway Well, they are really good for people who are open to discovering more about what they are really interested in. They are good for people who have not been successful finding their soul mate in real life because quite frankly they are looking for the wrong type of person in the wrong places. If you approach online dating with an open mind, you will likely be able to interact with many more disparate people then you normally hang out with, and in that process, discover more about what you like in other people, which may just change your mind about who you need in your life to complete you.
To that end, you should approach using an online dating system the way you would approach getting an education. It is possible to educate yourself without going to school, but going to a school makes it easier to obtain a well-rounded education. Similarly, it is possible for you to find the love of your life without using a dating site, but you will likely be exposed to a whole lot more varying people at a dating site than you would by tapping into your circle of friends..
So, open your heart and give online dating a try.
You can start here:
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/onlinedating.php
No comments:
Post a Comment